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Report: You’re Gonna Read This Page Right Fucking Now Or It’ll Be The Last Goddamn Thing You Ever Do

Posted By Turd Ferguson
Date Wednesday, 10 April 2019, at 12:50 p.m.

YOUR LOCATION—Affirming that you made the smart choice by clicking the link to this article, a follow-up report released today indicated that you’re gonna read this goddamn page like your life depends on it, because it most certainly does. “Are you scared? You should be. We need to increase our website’s click-through…

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