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‘Once They Put Me On Cheeses, I Will Finally Be Happy,’ Says Costco Employee Handing Out Free Vienna Sausage Samples

Posted By Turd Ferguson
Date Friday, 2 November 2018, at 3:16 p.m.

WINCHESTER, VA—Attributing her current apathy to being stuck in the wholesaler’s remote canned goods aisle, Costco employee Tanya Fairbanks quietly remarked Friday that “Once they put me on cheeses, I will finally be happy,” as she handed out free samples of Vienna sausage. “I used to think that if I could just get…

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