Naked, Out-Of-Breath CDC Director Announces Nation’s Fertility Rate No Longer In Decline

Posted By The Onion
Date Friday, 16 August 2019, at 11:53 a.m.

ATLANTA—Wiping the sweat from his brow and drinking from a glass of water, naked, out-of-breath CDC director Robert Redfield announced at a press conference Friday that the nation’s fertility rate was no longer in decline. “I am happy to announce that after a slow, two-decade decline in American birth rates, our…


Read more

This post was created from content on the Internet.